For myself first and foremost.

Bismillahirrahmanirrahim.

I can't really remember when I started to realise that writing is one of my strengths... well minus my so-not-girly handwriting. Back then in school, you know how the questions for language (Malay and English) are right? In that list of questions I have a high tendency to choose creative writing over factual/academic writing. I joined competitions. I found joy in creating stories and connecting the words dramatically, be it in English or Malay. I enjoy putting things into words.

As for blogging I started around 2008 or so. I was just a kid, and blogging was kind of the in-thing. Don't ask what were the things that I put in there, but they were definitely not something you would expect to come out of me. Even thinking about it makes me embarrassed sometimes. It has been safely deleted. But despite of all the foolish things I said, I actually enjoyed typing down my daily activities, new things I discovered, dissatisfaction and so forth.But despite of all this realisation that I have quite an ability to write, I never actually felt really passionate about it. All the competitions were just for the sake of joining and winning and trying out my luck, which most of the time, I was considerably lucky.

I'm not sure if it has developed into a passion or not, but recently I do feel some kind of relief when writing, especially on my journal which I just started after coming here. I started fresh with blogging around 2 years ago, which I failed to consistently write at first but I have overcome it after coming here, too. And not forgetting the success of "Kuadratik" (nerd aleeeert!!) Alhamdulillah.

As time passes my preference in the way of expressing my thoughts and ideas is expanding. Now, I am more into advocating in making the most out of life. We have a time limit to be in this world, which no one knows except for Allah, so why not make it more meaningful and presentable to Him in the Hereafter?

And in my current work I pour them all out, but as I am re-reading it I see that everything that I say is thrown back to my face.

"O you who have believed, why do you say what you do not do? Great is hatred in the sight of Allah that you say what you do not do." [As-Saff : 2-3]

And then I realised that actually we all know a bit of everything. We know how important it is to focus in our prayer. We know that prayer is an obligation upon us Muslims. We know the importance of sincerity. We know this, we know that. But there are things that we know but we don't practice, that we deliberately ignore on many unreasonable stances.  Or it's just seated at the very back of our head, waiting to come out.

So, everything that I said, is not merely me reminding everyone else, but it's a way of reminding myself, too. In the end, and in truth, it's me who needs them the most, a normal human being, still trying to strive and struggling to remain on His path. 

May Allah forgive us.